Funny Dog Quotes

I Love My Dog Quotes

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“A dog will teach you unconditional love. If you can have that in your life, things won’t be too bad.” – Robert Wagner

“The bond with a true dog is as lasting as the ties of this earth will ever be.” – Konrad Lorenz

“Before you get a dog, you can’t quite imagine what living with one might be like; afterward, you can’t imagine living any other way.” – Caroline Knapp

“Fall in love with a dog, and in many ways you enter a new orbit, a universe that features not just new colors but new rituals, new rules, a new way of experiencing attachment.” – Caroline Knapp

“Everybody should have a shelter dog. It’s good for the soul.” – Paul Shaffer

“The poor dog, in life the firmest friend. The first to welcome, foremost to defend.” – Lord Byron

“The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man’s.” – Mark Twain

“It is amazing how much love and laughter they bring into our lives and even how much closer we become with each other because of them.” – John Grogan

“Petting, scratching, and cuddling a dog could be as soothing to the mind and heart as deep meditation and almost as good for the soul as prayer.” – Dean Koontz

“It’s just the most amazing thing to love a dog, isn’t it? It makes our relationships with people seem as boring as a bowl of oatmeal.” – John Grogan

Dog Quotes Love And Loyalty And Dog Best Friend Quotes

“A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.” – Josh Billings

“Animals have come to mean so much in our lives. We live in a fragmented and disconnected culture. Politics are ugly, religion is struggling, technology is stressful, and the economy is unfortunate. What’s one thing that we have in our lives that we can depend on? A dog or a cat loving us unconditionally, every day, very faithfully.” – Jon Katz

“No matter how you’re feeling, a little dog gonna love you.” – Waka Flocka Flame

“There’s a saying. If you want someone to love you forever, buy a dog, feed it and keep it around.” – Dick Dale

“When the dog looks at you, the dog is not thinking what kind of a person you are. The dog is not judging you.” – Eckhart Tolle

“The great pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too.” – Samuel Butler

“Actually, my dog I think is the only person who consistently loves me all the time.” – H. G. Bissinger

“My main characters are the most sunny, happy, optimistic, loving creatures on the face of the Earth. I couldn’t be happier that’s where I start. I can put as many flawed people in the dog’s world as I like, but the dog doesn’t care. Dog doesn’t judge, dog doesn’t dislike. Dog loves. That’s not so bad.” – Bruce Cameron

“Such short little lives our pets have to spend with us, and they spend most of it waiting for us to come home each day.” – John Grogan

“There is no faith which has never yet been broken, except that of a truly faithful dog” – Konrad Lorenz

“If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.” – Mark Twain

“A dog will make eye contact. A cat will, too, but a cat’s eyes don’t even look entirely warm-blooded to me, whereas a dog’s eyes look human except less guarded. A dog will look at you as if to say, ‘What do you want me to do for you? I’ll do anything for you.’ Whether a dog can in fact, do anything for you if you don’t have sheep [I never have] is another matter. The dog is willing.” – Roy Blount Jr.

“Dogs have given us their absolute all. We are the center of their universe. We are the focus of their love and faith and trust. They serve us in return for scraps. It is without a doubt the best deal man has ever made.” – Roger A. Caras

Funny Dog Quotes

“Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.” – Groucho Marx

“My fashion philosophy is, if you’re not covered in dog hair, your life is empty.” – Elayne Boosler

“No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does.” – Christopher Morley

“Dog is God spelled backward.” – Duane Chapman

“Scratch a dog and you’ll find a permanent job.” – Franklin P. Jones

“A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down.” – Robert Benchley

“When a man’s best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem.” – Edward Abbey

“Dogs have boundless enthusiasm but no sense of shame. I should have a dog as a life coach.” – Moby

“You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.” – Harry S Truman

“The dog is the god of frolic.” – Henry Ward Beecher

“Anybody who doesn’t know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.” – Franklin P. Jones

“What do dogs do on their day off? Can’t lie around – that’s their job.” – George Carlin

“I don’t understand people who don’t touch their pets. Their cat or dog is called a pet for a reason.” – Jarod Kintz

“If you don’t own a dog, at least one, there is not necessarily anything wrong with you, but there may be something wrong with your life.” – Roger A. Caras

“All his life he tried to be a good person. Many times, however, he failed. For after all, he was only human. He wasn’t a dog.” – Charles M Schulz

“I like dogs. You always know what a dog is thinking. It has four moods. Happy, sad, cross, and concentrating. Also, dogs are faithful and they do not tell lies because they cannot talk.” – Mark Haddon

“I’ve seen a look in dogs’ eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts.” – John Steinbeck

“They [dogs] never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation.” – Jerome K. Jerome

INSPIRATIONAL DOG LOVE QUOTES

“Every dog must have his day.” – Jonathan Swift “Dogs are better than human beings because they know but do not tell.” “Dogs do speak, but only to those who know how to listen.”– Orhan Pamuk “The dog lives for the day, the hour, even the moment.” – Robert Falcon Scott “Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.”—Rodger A. Caras “You can usually tell that a man is good if he has a dog who loves him.” – W. Bruce Cameron “You can tell by the kindness of a dog how a human should be.” – Captain Beefheart “The bond with a true dog is as lasting as the ties of this earth will ever be.” – Konrad Lorenz “The world would be a nicer place if everyone had the ability to love as unconditionally as a dog.” “The love of a dog is a pure thing. He gives you a trust which is total. You must not betray it.” – Michel Houellebecq “A dog will teach you unconditional love. If you can have that in your life, things won’t be too bad.” – Robert Wagner “You know, a dog can snap you out of any kind of bad mood that you’re in faster than you can think of.” – Jill Abramson “I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me, they are the role model for being alive.” – Gilda Radner “Before you get a dog, you can’t quite imagine what living with one might be like; afterward, you can’t imagine living any other way.” – Caroline Knapp “My favorite type of pet has always been a dog. They’re loyal, kind, and offer endless affection. My friend Eric says, ‘The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.’ Funny thought.” – Brendon Urie “After years of having a dog, you know him. You know the meaning of his snuffs and grunts and barks. Every twitch of the ears is a question or statement, every wag of the tail is an exclamation.”—Robert McCammon

FAMOUS SHORT QUOTES ABOUT DOG LOVE

“I wish all men were like dogs.”—Halle Berry “A dog’s spirit dies hard.”—Mikhail Bulgakov “The more people I meet the more I like my dog.” “If you want a friend, buy a dog.” – Kevin O’Leary “Only my dogs will not betray me.”—Maria Callas “Dogs never bite me. Just humans.”—Marilyn Monroe “Dogs are my favorite people.” —Richard Dean Anderson “Everything I know I learned from dogs.” – Nora Roberts “I’m not alone, said the boy. I’ve got a puppy.”—Jane Thayer “Dogs just need you and love, that’s all.”— Jennifer Westfeldt “Dogs are the magicians of the universe.”—Clarissa Pinkola Estés “When you feel lousy, puppy therapy is indicated.”—Sara Paretsky “The more boys I meet, the more I love my dog.” —Carrie Underwood “Whoever said you can’t buy happiness forgot little puppies.”—Gene Hill “Dogs’ lives are too short. Their only fault, really.” – Agnes Sligh Turnbull “Everybody should have a shelter dog. It’s good for the soul.” – Paul Shaffer “The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man’s.” – Mark Twain “If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.” – Will Rogers “The poor dog, in life the firmest friend. The first to welcome, foremost to defend.” – Lord Byron “When you adopt a dog, you have a lot of very good days and one very bad day.” – W. Bruce Cameron “You think dogs will not be in heaven? I tell you, they will be there long before any of us.” – Robert Louis Stevenson “If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.” – James Thurber “It’s just the most amazing thing to love a dog, isn’t it? It makes our relationships with people seem as boring as a bowl of oatmeal.” – John Grogan “It is amazing how much love and laughter they bring into our lives and even how much closer we become with each other because of them.” – John Grogan “If you have a dog, you will most likely outlive it; to get a dog is to open yourself to profound joy and, prospectively, to equally profound sadness.” – Marjorie Garber

CUTE HAPPY DOG QUOTES AND SAYINGS

“Happiness is a warm puppy.” —Charles M. Schulz “No matter how you’re feeling, a little dog gonna love you.” – Waka Flocka Flame “If I could be half the person my dog is, I’d be twice the human I am.”—Charles Yu “It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.” – Mark Twain “Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail.” – Kinky Friedman “Dogs are better than human beings because they know but do not tell.”—Emily Dickinson “A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.” – Josh Billings “There is no faith which has never yet been broken, except that of a truly faithful dog” – Konrad Lorenz “Actually, my dog I think is the only person who consistently loves me all the time.” – H. G. Bissinger “There’s a saying. If you want someone to love you forever, buy a dog, feed it and keep it around.” – Dick Dale “The dog is the perfect portrait subject. He doesn’t pose. He isn’t aware of the camera.” – Patrick Demarchelier “My dogs have been the reason I have woken up every single day of my life with a smile on my face.”—Jennifer Skiff “When the dog looks at you, the dog is not thinking what kind of a person you are. The dog is not judging you.” – Eckhart Tolle “Such short little lives our pets have to spend with us, and they spend most of it waiting for us to come home each day.” – John Grogan “If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.” – Mark Twain